It's 2:36am 05/03/2011. Can't put myself to sleep. Listening to songs that I keep from 2009. A lot of memories flash back in my head. Makes me think what have I done in these past years. Did I ever change? Is changing into someone else is bad? Is changing myself into someone better is bad? Is changing based on someone called copying/ not being yourself? Teenagers(including me) nowadays often thinks they need to be themselves, does that mean every person need to have different interest, clothes and behavior?
Too many things running in my mind. Some of them are memories some is random thoughts. I never did anything to make myself proud. If I wake up tomorrow and suddenly a child waking me up calling me "Papa" what can I do to impress him. I feel like my whole life is pointless. Never made anyone happy. Tried, but fail. This is not some "give me attention" thingy but I really mean it. Have you guys ever think about it? I do think some of you did. I don't really like thinking about this but I can't really help it.
Life's a bitch, so if yours is easy then you're doing it wrong.
I forgot where did I found this quote but i gotta say I agree with it. Nothing in life is easy, but still you gotta live your life. Someone always said to me "live your life to the fullest" but what the hell does that mean? Does it mean you gotta do what you want in life. Honestly speaking, if that really what it means then I'll never have a chance in making a family. I mean in life you have that shit called responsibilities and I think many of us is not a fan of him but that shit is the thing that keeping us and probably the whole world together.
I'm just confused, and maybe a little curious. That's all.